I will never know. 

I will never know what racism feels like. 

I will never know how it feels to be persecuted. 

I will never know what bias feels like. 

I am not a minority. I am a white middle class Christian woman. I do not fear being passed over for a job based on the color of my skin. I don’t think for a moment about not getting every opportunity out there. I do not fear being arrested. I have never worried about being killed simply for existing. 

As I sit here in my bed I am struggling to understand how so many people in this country must feel tonight. There are people who must be worrying that this could happen to them. And I know that I will never worry. That thought is keeping me awake. 

In this country we have a race problem. There is no point in denying it. The media can try to say the attack in Charleston was an attack against Christians. It wasn’t. The media can say this was one person with mental illness. It wasn’t. This attack was the result of a racist culture that is going unchecked and ignored. 

And as a white woman in this country I will never know. I can only strive to speak out against racism when I see it. I can hope that by trying to understand and continue the conversation I can help to affect change. Because while I will never know how it feels to be a victim of racism that does not mean I can ignore it. 

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